Ann Arbor, MI- According to an insider at the U-M Biochemical research lab, U-M is currently developing an antiviral vaccine in light of coming events. U-M is slated to have an expedition squad into State College this Saturday. State College, home to the Pennsylvania State University, is a city infested with the T-virus, where victims of the horrid disease randomly attacks living human beings, and in the process transmit the disease to them.
Heavily geared and armed with rifles, grenades, and a lot of medipacks, the squad will attempt to remove any traces of the T-virus, amidst screams of "NOOOO!!!", "BRAAAINNNS!!", and "COME TO PENN STHAAATEE!"
T-virus is believed to have originated from Joe "Zombie King" Paterno and the virus quickly transmitted campus wide. The epidemic is quickly going out of control, and is believed to have escalated since it was first discovered 12 years ago. Each year, the U-M squad will attempt to suppress the crisis by obliterating any victims of the disease. For 12 years now, the Michigan squad has accomplished the mission, although not without close calls, as Michigan learned with a last second turn around in 2005.
Outlook for this years squad is bleak, as the T-virus has mutated significantly, with their new "Spread HD" which stands for Spread High Definition, meaning no human will be spared. Will the Zombie King finally reign control over humanity? Or will the Michigan squad emerge victorious, again? Only time will tell.
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